daily exhale

Pulling back the reins on hobby - personal blogging to strangers.

Business blogging and writing aside, I'm noticing I'm blogging and writing more; but not for the world, not for strangers.  I'm writing for my friends.  As much fun as I've had social posting for the world as a creative outlet, it's really not for any purpose, other than sharing with my friends. 

Solution:  create a private blog for my friends and I to dump. This is not FB, this is very targeted to special groups of intimate friends that will only see it and it won't be in their news feed.  I'm finding more freedom and receiving more joy from the private comments and "conversation." It feels more like a visit.

My favorite is with a group of women from my school circle.  They see me weekly and check up on me, know my family and understand my humor.  This is fun.  They also pick me up on the days of sad or muddled posts.  I also enjoy visiting with the chapter leaders in my non-profit, Binky Patrol. These women have great hearts and a wry sense of humor that not everyone would get outside our organization.  We have our place to laugh, vent and support.

In the past, I've splatter blogged to express myself. It helped, but there is nothing to replace real relationships with real, live friends you can decide to meet with, give a hug, and share out loud laughter rather than emoticons, LOL's and the like.

Try it - get back to real people relationships. Put down the texting unless you're scheduling a brief visit, or pick up the phone once in a while. Don't lose the ability to communicate in person.  It's becoming a dying art.  When was the last time you blogged for your live friends?  Try it, it feels good.

Try it:

Free sites on Shutterfly.  I find the share sites are PERFECT for this application.  Quick journal entries, regular emailed recaps for the posts and photos. It's a great way to share photos in a community for printing, photo books, etc.  We have one for our brownie troop, one for my daughters class, one for "the moms" and others.  They are all private - members only can view and share the photos.

I'm not that kind of advocate.

Advocacy is not being the go-to person for tattletales.

Being an advocate is a big part of who I am. But I'm not the type of advocate to do all the work for someone.  I'd rather teach them to stand up for themselves, take action, be stronger.  If they are unable (not to be confused with unwilling) then I'm happy to step in and do what I can to help them.

Our bus stop has turned into a bit of victim, gossipy drama.  We have two factions:  Those who live in houses and those who live in the apartments.  I'm friends with both, but seem to be in the minority.  One side makes snide remarks about the other, the other reads too much into it and tattles, whines to me.  I'm not that kind of advocate.

Why is it that we continuously stay in jr. high or elementary school?  We should be beyond this.  Self-imposed victims are unattractive and annoying. Buck UP!  Take responsibility for yourself. If you overhear someone saying something unkind, you have two choices:  accept what they say or change it.  If you change it, you will have to be brave and ask them about the comment. This shows that:

1. you are not deaf

2. you are respecting yourself and your family

3. you won't tolerate "mean girls" syndrome

If you choose to accept it, don't complain to anyone else - especially me if you are unwilling to take action.  You are allowing their meanness seep into you so you can absorb their unkind, uneducated, prejudiced feelings.

Hmm, doesn't sound like much of a choice to me.

I got out four years ago. She just caught on.

An honest take from today’s LA Times…Thanks for sending this Bret and, thank you Candice for writing what I figured out years ago. 

Dear California, I'm dumping you
I thought it would last forever, but you've changed and I want out.
By Candice Reed , August 16, 2009


Dear California,

I've been thinking about this for a very long time, and I've come to the conclusion that we should go our separate ways. I thought I loved you and it would last forever, but I was so very wrong.

I know that our relationship has lasted 50 years and that we should fight to stay together, but you've changed so much that, frankly, I don't know who you are anymore!

When we first met I was young and rather naive, and I loved you unconditionally. I spent years running with abandon across your sandy beaches in the bright sunshine, playing in your beautiful parks and attending your top-rated schools, which were a national model for the other states. For 18 years or so, I can honestly say that I was truly in love with you, but then came your first major transgression: Proposition 13.

Oh sure, you tried to tell me that property taxes were bad for our relationship, but I knew you were lying. Low taxes, you said, would bring us closer together. You wanted to have your cake and eat it too. You said we could build schools and roads and parks without that tax money, but even back then I knew you were in denial.

Making Preschoolers Cry with Art

 This is a testament that even the simplest craft ideas with a beautiful intention can still go terribly awry.  This was the case in my celebration of Dr. Seuss today at our son's preschool.  I read the idea to make a simple craft - a pencil with a pink pom-pom on top and a "speck" glued on in honor of Horton.  I hand wrote the famous line, "A Person is a Person, No Matter How Small" since this was for preschoolers. Idyllic, yes.  Successful, no.

Check your child's homework before they take it to school

Sometimes my sister just makes me laugh very hard.  She just sent this to me. It cracked me up so I'm sharing it with you.  Life Lesson# 45893: Always check your child's homework before it gets to school!